Confessions

Why is it that we confess? That it makes us feel lighter mentally and emotionally might be a good reason to go with.

Another question that now crops up is who to confess to?
Parents?  Or Siblings? Or Best Friend? Or a Complete Stranger??


What would you expect a person to do once you have made your confession to him/her? In most of the cases, you would like the person to not spread the word anymore (at least not spread it within your circle of friends or other relations)

So, from the above, to whom do you think is the safest and most reliable to confess to??

Eddy Johnson was upset with his personal life and so left for a park to spend some time alone.

There, he found an empty bench. Adjacent to it sat a man on a bench that faced the opposite side and so Eddy could only see the hat of that person.

Silence prevailed for a while. Suddenly, for some reason, Eddy spoke out his thoughts.

He said sobbingly, “ I feel so guilty for what I am doing”.

The Man (Calmly) : What’s the matter?

Eddy :      It’s my girlfriend Christine.

The Man: What about her?

Eddy:       She loves me a lot and I love her a lot too. I really don’t want to lose her.
               But...(Pauses)

The Man:  But?

Eddy:       There is this another girl whom I met recently and....and we spent a little 
               time together and......we spent the last night together. 
               Oh man! I feel so ashamed of myself for this. I feel i have cheated her.

The Man:  I would call that a....a coincidence!

Eddy:       What do you mean? You too?? Have you also been cheating somebody?

The Man:  No. I suspected my wife of that. She being a young lady, would sometimes go
               out in the evenings and wouldn't turn up till late in the night.

Eddy:       So what did you do about it?

The Man:  Hired a private detective to check on her.

Eddy:       What did he say then? The detective

The Man:  Called me early this morning and i turns out she was actually cheating on me.

Eddy:       Oh!

The Man: He also added that she was with someone else last night.

Eddy:      So what are you doing here then?       

The Man: Waiting for somebody to confess to...

Eddy:       Confess about?

The Man:  She came back home in the morning at 8. I was waiting for her in the drawing
                room.
               She came in and went directly into kitchen to prepare breakfast for me.


Eddy(Anxiously): And?

The Man(Calmly):  I murdered her!

               Stabbed her with a knife. 

(He had deliberately used the word murder as it wasn’t an unplanned, impulsive emotion that had driven him to kill her. It was due to the anger that had accumulated in him over a period of time.)

Eddy was left completely shocked.

After a few moments of silence, the man spoke out saying, "I think my job here is done now and so i think it's time I leave."

It wasn't until a few minutes that Eddy regained his senses and then he too left.

Eddy hadn't seen the Man's face and neither did the Man see his. They were perfect strangers to each other. Several questions remain unanswered:


- Will these confessions of the two give them the emotional  calmness they were seeking?


- Will the confessions of both Eddy and The Man remain a secret just between the two?


- Was The Man's wife the same girl Eddy had been hanging out with?



 

Life is Easy?

(From an Adolescent’s Perspective)

“A collage of all the thoughts that relentlessly keep striking me now and then, all coming together to form a fascinating jigsaw puzzle. If not for anything else, this is to serve my memory.” – one of my senior’s intro to his blog.

Origin of the thought

This thought struck me when I was in my “Development Alternatives” Class. That’s my Minor course and I must say Prof. Jyotirmaya Tripathi rocks in his own way!

He has completely eradicated my misconception that Development is chiefly Financial. He claims it’s more of World politics, History and the evolution of Philosophy over years. It’s usually very rare that some of your opinions are influenced by other people.( this one especially because the moment we listen to the word “Development” we immediately think of poverty, money etc.) 

During one of its class, the Prof. was explaining various problems, difficulties faced by society in course of history. The problems were not very direct in the sense that some of them had long lasting psychological impact. This led me to think about the various issues that don’t affect us (the adolescents) directly but do have a large impact on our minds and emotions. Some of them are as follows:

Incomplete Control On Own Life

The fact that we ourselves can’t completely control our own life is sometimes unbearable. The world from the outside seems to be a place of infinite possibilities. But, often we face situations where in spite of all our efforts, we fail to achieve what we had tried so hard for. This has a really big impact on one’s sub-conscious. It is really difficult to convince ourselves that the structure of the world has evolved in such a way that it can’t support the fact that we can have complete control on our actions and future.

Struggle For Recognition

They say the fourth basic necessity of a human being (after Food, Shelter and Clothing) is Recognition. Call it Ego or a feedback system necessary for survival, people in some or the other way struggle for this and its impact on one’s subconscious is very deep. Failure to gain recognition sometimes even leads to nervous breakdowns. They say most of our actions are influenced by the need for recognition and as we all can see it’s the era where all people want is fame and there’s no limit to what people can do for it. Eg:- The Reality Shows (especially the ones in Channel V and MTV)

Statistically Impossible Targets Set By Profs and Teachers

First of all, the sub-heading deliberately has the phrase “Profs and Teachers” since they both aren’t the same in all cases. Only a few Profs qualify to be considered as teachers.

Almost all things in nature are assumed to follow a Normal (or Gaussian in technical words) Distribution from Statistical perspective. This means that when you consider any system, the fraction of the system that can be rated above 9/10 will be hardly 5%.(meaning the remaining 95% of the system is either ordinary or below average). In such a case, why do Profs and even teachers expect everybody to do an excellent job?

And after receiving the results from students (which follow the above mentioned distribution), Profs aren’t satisfied and express their ‘deep’ disappointment in front of students. This is only the beginning. Then the Prof very conveniently, aiming at student’s Ego, indicates that they are probably not even worth sitting in his class and listening to him. This might not have a really major impact on teenagers (since they adapt themselves to such lectures by Profs by then). But if we consider the same case in primary education, it has a quite deep effect on the vulnerable and sensitive minds of children. In some cases, might even develop an inherent inferiority complex on being repeatedly given such brainwashes.

Hidden Talent

Very aptly named, this sometimes has done harm on being undiscovered and also on discovering it.

As far as it being undiscovered is considered, one of the examples is me myself. Tried a lot of stuff (Sciences, Memory, IQ, Sports and even Music) till date but couldn’t discover it. Although it doesn’t really have a direct effect on a person or his actions, but sometimes it creates a kind of void space at some corner of our mind thinking about the absence of a talent.

For the people who have successfully discovered it, it sometimes becomes such an obsession that they tend to neglect their mainstream activities. (the activities we do for a ‘living’) The society or parents in general aren’t open to adolescents moving in the direction of their talent.

And in some cases, people who, due to peer pressure, don’t give much time to enhancing their talent feel inferior for the fact that they aren’t doing justice to their talent and that they are completely wasting the very thing they were born to do.

I (Express) Love You

Hello There!! :-)
This turns out to be my first post on a blog.The topic i have chosen didnt really come all of a sudden.It comes as a result of gradual accumulation of different opinions formed in mind by observing people in so called "love"(both in reel and real life) and also the speed at which people enter into relationships.

As many say,"love" as the present generation sees it isnt really Love.The great writers and authors of medevial period have defined Love in a different way as compared to the present trend and perception.We've even had Shakespeare saying in a comic mood(for a change from drama) saying,
"Love is Beautiful,Wonderful and Amazing.You feel its the best thing in the world,until it happens to your daughter" .
But then it is said that "Culture evolves with the generation and that society should adapt itself to the changes".But,normally the speed of acceptance by the older generation falls behind the speed of change.(Commonly known as Generation Gap)
Now,the question is "Is it true that whatever is being percevied by people as love isnt actually Love or has the modern defintion of love changed?"

Lets try answering the question:-
After thinking upon this topic for a few days,I had come up with a theory(which holds good for Indian Scenario as i could only observe and think on this part)which might partially answer the question.
Consider the old days when Ladies were practically not allowed to go out of their houses.But as time progressed,they gradually started coming out.Nevertheless,there wasnt a big change in the picture because the social rules didnt practically allow any conversations between Males and Females of the same age group.
Again as time passed,people started to find ways to overcome the obstacles of the socail rules.(this is quite natural in any system in nature)People started meeting secretly and some of them could eventually progress while others couldnt go ahead with it due to family reasons.
At the same time i would like to clarify that not every person was involved in such activities.A certain section of people where familes were a little less conservative which lead to a little non-conservative thinking in the person would result in such things.(which is sometimes even true in present world).
So what happens is people would very rarely find time to meet and talk.This way, inter-gender communication was quite less frequent and was slow.It would take months or even years to know a person properly.Hence entering into relationships was a rather slow process then.And they say that this kind of approach is advisable as you gradually come to know about the other person.You slowly understand the person,cherish the good things in them,digest the undesirable qualities.(and as process is slow,its usually not very rough)
Now Lets take the case of present world:-
Here lets assume that the two people in the study are completely new to each other in the beginning.
Many Pscychologists and experts believe that Cinema and Novels have a deep impact in one's mind in this regard(and the former has a much more impact than the latter as it creates a more clear picture and opinion in our minds).
And to be honest,I am also of the same opinion and in some cases have even seen it happenning practically infront of my eyes.
To add to this effect is the coincidence of this period with "The Era Of Communication".(and Thanks also to the really expensive and low on substance Food Courts and Coffee Shops(With Really Catchy Taglines like"A Lot Can Happen Over Coffee"))
All this process needs is just a spark which comes in the form of just a single introductory meeting where the mobile numbers and e-mail addresses are exchanged.
And Then starts the curiousity stage(as they say the most exciting part of any relation is the beginning stage of it as you are curious to know new things about new people) where either of the two becomes more and more curious about the other.(in some cases both become curious and such a case i would personally call "The Lucky Pair").Now,contrary to the olden times,we neither have really strict socail rules nor lack of communication.Whats even better,who on earth cares if two people meet in food courts or Coffee Shops and keep talking for hours together.(Parents would have cared if only they knew the real location and intention of their children)
And here comes the best part,Chatting and SMS.While Chatting,a person involuntarily assumes that he/she isnt talking to another person but to a machine which wouldn't really mind the speed at which some really personal and private details are being revealed and discussed.(Imagine the same set of people new to each other and sitting on adjacent benches of a classroom.Would they even dare to raise any personal issue in the first 5 meetings or so?)
SMS,i feel should be given the first Nobel prize to a non-Human in the field of Communication enhancement.This Tool is so extensively used that people in two different places are in contact with each other even when lying on their beds ready to sleep at a very very low price.(In some cases next to free of cost)
Actually this is what SMS turns out to be:-

SMS=Chatting + Infinite Portability

So effectively what happens is people get to communicate so quickly they come to know too much about each other in a very little amount of time.
And the last line justifies the title of this post.The stage comes when one of the two comes up with probably the greatest line ever said or written on earth "I Love You",which in modern cases means "I(Express) LoveYou" because of the speed of the progress and the uncertainity in the line "I Love You".
So,Assuming Peace and Happiness as the highest priority,It'll Be Better if we differentiate between the two as "Love" And "Express Love" so that even classic praisers and critics of LOVE are happy as well as the modern generation is Happy.
Thats probably a little blunt ending,but then if a solid answer to such questions are found,the very basis of existence of Psychology is destroyed. :-P